We need to share our friends to possess them more fully. One person can’t bring out all another’s facets. Lovers are face to face but friends point in the same direction with common interests. Lovers talk about their love but friends rarely talk about friendship. Friendship is a love we can live without and is often discouraged among the subjects of leaders and who fear revolt. To the ancients, friendship was the happiest and fully human of loves! In comparison the modern world ignores it – ” a man needs few friends” It’s a side order – not a main course in life’s banquette! Few value it as few really experience it. “Dogs and cats should be brought up together, it broadens their minds!” (Of course there’s no such thing as an ordinary person) Affection allows an appreciation of things we never thought possible, and creates a platform for the other loves. Affection teaches us first to notice, endure, and appreciate ordinary people.

When affection enters the other loves, the whole experience is more colourful – the difference between a friend and an old friend! It is quite difficult to build any of the other loves without some sort of affection fisrt. Like affection for a favourite jacket or a familiar sound or smell. Affection also can exist on its own, apart from the other loves.

You can be affectionate towards someone who ordinarily you’d dislike! “That old so and so”. charity (Divine love) – the love of giving.Eros (natural love3) – the love of love.friendship (natural love2) – brotherly love.affection (natural love1) – affection for things and people.We can divide the need loves into, affection, friendship, Eros, and add them to charity (divine love) – making our four loves! The Four Loves In ‘what is love’, we made the distinction between Divine or gift-love (so called because it demands nothing in return and is closest to love himself) and the ‘natural’ or need-loves (so called because they are earthly human loves – born of a need to be loved). Love can be divided into four different distinct typesĪdapted from C.S.Lewis ‘book The Four Loves’.

Book the four loves